killtherave

 Good afternoon to all! I know it has been almost a year since I last updated my journal and well here I am. I'm supposed to be doing research for my SM assignment which is due on 21 August but the procrastinator in me never change. But what I'm actually really psyched about is RAYA! It is actually approaching very quickly and we are already halfway through with fasting month! Its so fast its kinda scary and good at the same time. Most of the things that is needed to be done to the house is completed. I'd say about 85% of the phase. Just left with painting (which I am not looking forward to. I really hope Dad would change his mind and pay someone to do it for us cause it is A LOT of work), spring cleaning again when Raya approaches, a little shifting and some last minute furniture buying I guess. Gosh I can feel the excitement! But I should really get "excited" with my assignments. I'm waiting for Aniq Irfan's arrival actually. He is turning 2 next month. How time flies. My darling is growing up so fast! I'm just waiting for him to start talking to me. I know its going to be a lot to handle but as long as he stays cute why not! tsk

Anyways, I have yet to iftar with my friends esp BFF & The Sexes. I actually miss a lot of people. I haven't gone out with Dewi in the longest time ever. Sigh. Soon I hope. I shall transform this lj into something more interesting. Maybe things that I enjoy like makeup. 

Stay tuned! ;)

xoxo

 Exam results would be out in a few hours hence why I'm still up. But somehow, listening to this song, put my mind at ease and if it is destined to be mine, Insya Allah it will. 

Fad's nyai has just passed away a few hours ago. It breaks my heart as I know how it feels like to lose your grandparents one after another. What more if you were close to them and they loved you so much. My grandparents doted on me. Never scolded me. Never lay a finger on me. Protected me when my parents scolded me. Fed me when I was hungry. Kept me warm in their care. I miss them. I truly do :'( I remembered staying strong when they departed from this world as I don't want to make it difficult for them. But what tore me apart was to see my mom go weak in her knees and feeling helpless. I pray that Fad's Mum would be stronger and Fad would catch her if anything were to happen. Be there for her love. She needs all her children to support her. I do hope his sis would make it back to Singapore in time. She must be feeling helpless and lonely stranded in DXB trying to get a flight back by any means. Worst part is, tomorrow is DXB National Day and Emirates office would be closed. Sigh...I really hope that she gets back in time to kiss her beloved nyai Goodbye.

Semoga rohnya dicucuri Rahmat. 
Al-Fateha.

 Oh My God! Had a terrible fight with mom over me dying my hair and she made it sound like I'm a child of satan! Mom, I know you're cursing, swearing and hating me right now. But I still love you. I know you're not going to talk to me for a no. of years but its okay. I wont try to anger you more by being in the house too often yah. I love you mak.

With that said, quite obvious I did the hated. HAHAHHA. Trying to be rebellious but my heart raced, my stomach twirled and my throat had a lump everytime I hear the key being pushed into the knob thinking whether she's back home or not. The thing is, if I dont do it now, she won't try to accept it. And if she dont accept it, how to dye lighter color right? Im thinking of ashy blonde next. HAHAHAH. melampau I know.

Hennyways, BFF lured me into trying this...



without the brush though cause Singapore does not package it together. Lame! But I think if it comes with the brush it could be priced over 40? Which is no longer drugstore range. Hahahhahah. Hennyways, I've tried it for a day and Im prettty impressed with the quality. I used my hands cause my kabuki was dirty with my MSF powder. So she warned me not to put on so much. But the softness and the ease of it blending into my skin, I kept dipping in over and over again. It felt soft on my skin like as if I was putting on powder not foundation. While in my room with bad lighting, I couldn't see any coverage but when I got out and switch on the light, OMG the coverage was as good as Revlons Colorstay! My 'bopengs' can still be seen tho as that one is gone case already. But I am really amazed. Throughout the day, and it  was a HOT SUNNY DAY, it did not slip off my face. And I have extremely oily face and it didnt get shiny till prolly after 5 hours or more? Which is great! I can't say I totally LOVE this cause I need to use it for awhile to see if it has any bad side effects. So I give it 3/5 as it has a weird smell!


Sorry for the random product review. I seriously dont know what to write in this space anymore.

P.S: A very late hari raya to all!

Hello earthlings. I am not in the best of mood now but I'm just posting something to relax myself from the stressful assignments! ARGH! When would this ever end??? Anyways, I don't know whether what I'm writing is right or wrong for the topic but whatever. Id laugh at this post after 20th August cause thats my due date! *PULLS HAIR* I've always been a procrastinator and I can't seem to kick that habit. Sometimes, what I need is my friends to understand what I'm going through. I dont need you to perfectly know the situation but just accept it would be nice. We all have our busy times and if I can understand yours, why not mine? And its usually the same person time and time again. The world does not revolve around you honey.

Anyways, we've already reached the 8th day of fasting! And due to that I'm constipated! thanks ah. what else? Oh I'm enjoying watching YOG cause the atheletic(?) boys and swimmers are yummmeh! Though they're my juniors but dang! check out that barreh!

What colors are you guys going for this year's raya? I want my fish and chips, grilled cala and lemon butter mussels nowwwwww! =(

Ok bye.

 I never really knew what ungrateful means till I met you. I have somehow got the rough idea of what is the meaning behind it but throughout my 20yrs of life, there are a number of ungrateful people but they weren't such major fuckers till you entered my life 2 years ago. I must say, he made a stupid decision of falling in love with you till making you his soulmate. What was he thinking? He may not be that good looking but hey, HE CAN DEFINITELY DO MUCH BETTER THAN THAT. The first time I saw your picture my reaction was "How old is she? She looks so freaking old to be his gf." Guess what? That perception has never changed. Kau sedar diri kau tu apa? TUA KUTUK TAK SADAR DIRI.

1) I've never looked down on any race completely. Well, I do have my dislikes but due to you, I freaking hate ARABS. They are a bunch of arrogant mofos in this world! Do you know, in their own family they have their classes and they actually do follow the traditional ways? My parents told me " Do you know why God brought down all the prophets into Arab? Because Arabians are the 2nd most evil kind of humans and God did that to 'neutralize' it". So people, just because they're Arabs, doesn't mean they're holy. I think they're worst than the worst kind of people I could think of.

2) Racial issues aside. This is your 2nd marriage, and you are what...30+? Isn't it bloody time to settle down and do things right and put your  brains to work instead of your attitude? Cmon for god sake! 3 kids and you're still acting like an 18 years old?! My sister who is 15, is much wiser than you thank you!

3) You're finance is terrible. You're 30+ unstable, part time job and depending on him. Yet, you complain and to you he's not good enough. Then why marry him in the first place?! Why not go with your "sugar daddy" that you had when you were single?! I wouldn't be surprised of the things you're capable of doing just to have some cash in hand! You should be blessed to have his family who actually gives you a place to stay and feeds you and even give you money! Thats even better than an old folks home! Yet, you don't help with the chores but...YOU STILL COMPLAIN!!! Complain that the house is dirty etc.etc. FUCK YOU! ID RATHER ADOPT A KID WHO IS IN NEED RATHER THAN HAVE YOUR STINKING BODY!

4) Since your finance is terrible, you owe money to the govt due to your previous divorce matters or whatever. Okay so you didn't get your GST offset package and your cursing and swearing the govt?! EH HELLO! WAKE UP YOUR PUNY BRAINS! DO YOU THINK THE GOVT WOULD NOT GIVE YOU FOR NO GOOD REASONS?! WHY DON'T YOU DARE TO LODGE A COMPLAINT?! BECAUSE YOU KNOW YOU OWE THEM AND IF YOU STILL GOT THE CHEEKS TO ASK FOR $200 YOU SURE ARE THICK SKINNED! For all you know, the workers are laughing their ass of at  you. I know, I used to work in that line before. Sheesh!

5)Since you're always short of cash...GO ON DUTCH INSTEAD OF BUYING BRANDED ITEMS AND UNNECESSARY GADGETS. Contradicting much? No wonder his salary is gone within a week. 

Wait till they kick you out. I would miss the little one, but its okay. He would miss me too and when he grows up, he would learn of who you really are. His paternal family loves him to bits and dotes on him with so much TLC. Just wait. He'll know who has been taking care of him when his useless mother was thinking about enjoying into the late nights.

This is what I call utterly disgraceful or malays would call it BODOH SOMBONG. You think you can live on your own? Try for one month. Your own family can't support you and you think you're so fucking great? Fuck you Arab. Just you.

So moron, Fuck you very very much. If you dare  step on my tail, face the consequences which is ugly.



PS: I need to go for anger management. My temper is outrageously dangerous for my health.

 Hello to all again if there are anybody out there still reading this. Tsk tsk. Anyways I'd like to wish a very Happy birthday to my dearest Dewi, Azimah and Dayya! Happy birthday girlies and enjoy your day ;)

Yesterday, we went on a triple date! Dewi & Romeo, Watie & Taufiq, Fad & Myself. It was a blast and it was worth every penny and though the sci-fi rides were closed we still managed to get onto other rides and catch some shows. Okay, its been awhile I've wrote in my journal and I think I sound a little weird. Anyhoos, it was our first time gathering together and luckily, it wasn't awkward. We were taking care of each other and laughing cheekily at one another especially at Romeo who is afraid of thrill rides. HAHA. Yeap the big one is a coward. Who would have known? *shrugs*

  
Here we go!
( Universal Studios Baby! )